Have you ever had your dog stolen from you? I have! It all happened on Thursday 4-15-08. I remember it like it was yesterday…..oh wait it was yesterday. Anyway like I was saying it was horrible. The burglar came to my door and said, “Can I have your dog?” Dum old me said,” Sure you can have him. I really like him a lot, but I’ll get over it in a year.” Then the burglar just took him right out of my hands. That jerk. Well maybe I should have been a little bit more smart. But hey I’m only 10. I “should be really really really smart” well at least that’s what my doctor says. He also says,” I should not eat a lot of sweets.” (But I love sugar rushes… they’re the best part of my life)…but tell my mom or my doctor. Anyway what was I talking about….oh yeah my dog. My dog he’s white or maybe black, oh just forget that dumb, cute, so adorable dog. (Sob) What the#*^#@ is that the burglar outside my door? “Hi. I just wanted to give you your dog back.” I jumped with joy. “Give me my dog back. I mean thanks.”
The next day the burglar came back and said,” Give me the dog man.” Then I ……….pulled out a leash and said,” Die! Die!” I started hitting the burglar with the leash until he was striped with red lines all over his back. No I’m just kidding. I really through him off a 1,000,000,000 yard cliff with jagged rocks at the bottom. Ok so that’s not true either but I did knock him down with a crow-bar and then I pulled down his pants and then I sent him way out in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. And then I…… (ring) ….I…. (ring)…..what is that noise? Oh well it stopped. What was I saying? Oh yeah And then I…… (ring) ….I…. (ring)…..that noise is coming from the door. I better go answer it. Oh my gosh it’s the burglar. “Hey give me the dog back!” he said. “No way you bad…. (pause)…….bad guy you.” I’ll give you a penny if you give me the dog.” “Make it two.” “OK!!!” “Sucker!!!!!!” Once he left my house with the “dog” I pulled out the real dog from behind my bed. Or so I thought. It was the fake dog, I gave the burglar the real dog. I’m such an idiot. I chased after the burglar for a year and I….I…..I’m in the car right now and I just saw the burglar. It’s a high speed chase. Yes he pulled over. “Dude why are you fowling me?” “You stole my dog.” “Was it white or black?” “I don’t remember. Why?” “Did it have a weird eye?” Yeah. Why?” “Oh I think that man has you’re dog over there.”
Once I caught up with the burglar I put a gun to his head and then I hit him in the head. OK. I didn’t hit him in the head with the gun but I did hit him all over with a Slim Jim. Man that was one funny thing, to see a 10 year old beating up an adult with a Slim Jim. Everybody was laughing.....
The next day the burglar came back and said,” Give me the dog man.” Then I ……….pulled out a leash and said,” Die! Die!” I started hitting the burglar with the leash until he was striped with red lines all over his back. No I’m just kidding. I really through him off a 1,000,000,000 yard cliff with jagged rocks at the bottom. Ok so that’s not true either but I did knock him down with a crow-bar and then I pulled down his pants and then I sent him way out in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. And then I…… (ring) ….I…. (ring)…..what is that noise? Oh well it stopped. What was I saying? Oh yeah And then I…… (ring) ….I…. (ring)…..that noise is coming from the door. I better go answer it. Oh my gosh it’s the burglar. “Hey give me the dog back!” he said. “No way you bad…. (pause)…….bad guy you.” I’ll give you a penny if you give me the dog.” “Make it two.” “OK!!!” “Sucker!!!!!!” Once he left my house with the “dog” I pulled out the real dog from behind my bed. Or so I thought. It was the fake dog, I gave the burglar the real dog. I’m such an idiot. I chased after the burglar for a year and I….I…..I’m in the car right now and I just saw the burglar. It’s a high speed chase. Yes he pulled over. “Dude why are you fowling me?” “You stole my dog.” “Was it white or black?” “I don’t remember. Why?” “Did it have a weird eye?” Yeah. Why?” “Oh I think that man has you’re dog over there.”
Once I caught up with the burglar I put a gun to his head and then I hit him in the head. OK. I didn’t hit him in the head with the gun but I did hit him all over with a Slim Jim. Man that was one funny thing, to see a 10 year old beating up an adult with a Slim Jim. Everybody was laughing.....